Michael Nel (Chael) Clinical Psychologist
email: chael@vodamail.co.za
HPCSA: PS 009 2347 / Practice No: 0231169
Welcome:
For more then 10 years I have been consulting at the Randburg Psychology Practice. I believe in straight forward, “say it as it is” counselling and not to waste your time and money. I provide to the point recommendations and discussion around a specific treatment plan. I do counselling in Afrikaans and English and have worked with racially diverse individuals and helped over 1000 adults, couples and teenagers.
My areas of specialities are:
- Relationship Counselling
- Couples & Marriage Counselling
- Long & Short Term Individual Counselling
- Stress and Anger Management
- Trauma Counselling
- Teenage Counselling & Parental Guidance
- Career and Subject Choice Counselling
- I am contracted to all Medical Aids
Other areas: anxiety, depression, substance abuse, bereavement and a wide variety of other issues.
I work with an individualized treatment plan, according to the person and the situation. Although the focus and process is unique for each individual, relationships and the interface between emotions and thinking/problem solving are key components of each of my counselling relationships. Although my general approach is a psychoanalytically informed psychotherapy, I draw on CBT, Nero Linguistical Programming (NLP), known for an important synthesis of knowledge about human communication and other approaches to best fit counselling to each client’s needs and understanding of his or her world.
My counselling focuses on increased mindfulness, enhanced self understanding, desired personal growth, connecting to one’s inner resourcefulness and the development of healthy coping skills. I work together with the client towards goal setting in a context of confidentiality and trust.
- TV appearances:
- The Great Expectations , eTV (2014)
- In Debt Series, SABC1 (2014)
- Radio appearances:
- SAFM, Jacaranda FM
- Articles Written
- Some Online Counselling
What to expect from your Psychologist?
So you are thinking about seeing a psychologist, but are unsure of what to expect. Naturally this is a question most people contemplate when the need for counselling or psychotherapy arises for the first time. Most of what we know about psychologists comes from either the media or friends and family that may have been to a see a psychologist.
In most cases you may bring many expectations to the therapy process even before you have seen a psychologist. You may feel excited, anxious and many other feelings as you try to find an appropriate and fully qualified psychologist for yourself. There are some key guidelines one should follow particularly if this will be your first time in a psychologists consulting room. The following guidelines are just that, a guide and at the end of the day, the best predictor of success in any form of counselling or therapy is the quality of relationship you develop with your psychologist.
Your psychologist should be open and honest regarding the process of therapy and how their brand of therapy works. This of course will differ from therapist to therapist. You should expect some information and relative transparency regarding the course of therapy, particularly around times, the therapist’s cancellation policy, fees and issues related to confidentiality and privacy.
Expect to have your queries, concerns and anxieties concerning therapy taken seriously by your therapist. Any psychologist who does not takes these concerns seriously should be avoided.
Expect that it will take some time before it feels like your psychologist has made some difference in terms of the problem you came into therapy with. The message is clear here. Therapy is not a quick fix and therefore one has to be able to be patient before you can see some kind of result. If you are coming to see a psychologist you can expect that if you have had a problem for some times (i.e. a few years), it will not be solved within a few sessions. If you expect to address issues you have had for six years in six sessions (6 hours), you will be disappointed.
Expect that you will have some ups and downs in therapy. There will be times where you will feel that you really don’t want to attend your therapy and other times when you will feels as if you are getting a lot out of the process. Bear with it as long as you can and don’t be afraid to be open regarding your feeling about the process. One of the biggest reasons that stalemates developing within the therapeutic relationship is the failure on the part of the client to openly discuss their negative feelings about their therapist.
Expect to see some improvement after a reasonable amount of time. If things do not seem better, discuss this with your therapist more fully. It may be time to try a new therapist or look at your current motivation for making changes in your life. Failure to see results usually stems from the way both the therapist and client are working together in therapy. In short when you see little or no improvement, the first focus should be on the nature of the therapeutic relationship between yourself and your therapist.
Expect your psychologist to foster a collaborative approach in the counselling setting. Psychotherapy works best when both parties actively contribute to the counselling process. Therefore expect that your psychologist will allow you the freedom to negotiate the agenda for therapy in a joint and mutually satisfactory manner.
Our areas of specialization offer answers to questions like:
Relationships
- I choose all the wrong people to be with. Where am I going wrong?
- My spouse cheated. Can this relationship be saved?
- Am I married to a jealous controller?
- We need help our marriage has reached breaking point!
- Neediness in my relationship. My boyfriend needs constant recognition and validation. How can I help him?
- Should I stay with my boyfriend who constantly blames me?
- I suddenly find myself alone and single, how do I cope?
Parental Guidance
- How do I control my teenager and hormones and destructive behaviour?
- My kids are always fighting. How do I deal with sibling rivalry?
- My child is being bullied at school. What should I do?
- How do I build better relationships with my rebellious teenager?
- Children, substance abuse and addictions. What are the signs?
- Family relationship and communication problems. My teenager stopped listening to me?
- How do I deal with family conflict?
- How do I deal with children from a previous marriage?
Children
- Behavioural and emotional problems.
- Adolescent issues and coping.
- I feel I am never good enough.
- Decision making as a teen
- How do I help my child to develop a better self esteem?
- I am not very popular as school. How can I make more friends?
Dieting & Weight Loss
- I have tried every diet on the market and still can’t loose weight!
- Why does most dieting efforts fail to produce results?
- Does my unwanted extra weight have some significant psychological basis?
- Learn about the underlying psychology about food and your relationship to food.
- Learn how psychological distress, trauma, guilt and unhappiness can often lead to comfort and binge eating.
- Do eating disorders have some psychological causes?
Midlife Crisis
- I used to turn heads, now I turn 50!
- Do men also experience a male menopause or the “Corvette syndrome?
- What precipitates the male midlife crisis?
- Can factors like job loss, divorce, depression, stress lead to early onset midlife crisis.
- Is reduced libido, depression, mood swings, irritability, fatigue, loss of a sense of wellbeing signs of a midlife crisis?
- How does the transition of changing male and female roles contribute to midlife crisis?
Depression
- Male depression: Feeling irritable, restless, angry, frustrated, decreased sleep, creates conflict, feeling ashamed, increased need for control, increased fear of failure, feeling others are to be blamed, increased substance abuse, e.g. alcohol. Often wonders “Am I being loved enough?”
- Female depression: Blame yourself, feeling sad, apathetic, worthless, anxious, scared, guilt feelings, withdraws when feeling hurt, sleep to much, troubles setting boundaries, often wonders “Am I loveable enough?”
Trauma
- I have been hi-jacked and I keep getting flash backs.
- I have troubles sleeping after an armed robbery.
- Domestic violence.
- Retrenchment.
Self Esteem
- I found myself constantly being invited to my own “self-pity-party”
- I have a hard time dealing with criticism and can not accept a compliment.
- I am overly concerned about what people think and I don’t rust my own opinion?
- How do I deal with my negative self image?
- My self confidence has been low since I can remember?
- Time and stress management.
- I hate my job!
- I have difficulties in controlling my anger.
Our services are offered in English and Afrikaans and soon we will be incorporating our Zulu and Sotho speaking clients!
Contracted to medical aid.
Learn more about this counsellor or send a secure email…
If you have suicidal thoughts, you may need help immediately and should pick up the phone and call: Lifeline: Toll free no: 0861 322 322 or the SA Depression and Anxiety Group, Suicide Helpline on 0800 567 567 from anywhere in South Africa.